Week 37: Road House

Dear Avid Reader,

I really don't like thinking. It's kind of a pain.

Think about THAT!

Take The Biggest Guy In The World, Shatter His Knee And He'll Drop Like A Stone

I experienced a problem recently when I attempted to describe my level of interest in a band. I wanted to say that I like the group, but that they did not rank among my favorites. So in a misguided effort to be accurate I ended up back-tracking and qualifying my opinion into meaninglessness. It sucked.

But I got to thinking, maybe the reason that it's hard to describe one's favor to a particular thing is that this country loves to exaggerate. It's a nation of polarization. And I think if reasonable discourse can be reached when discussing music/movies/etc., then reasonable discourse can be had during politics. She go with me on this.

It's Two Nouns Combined To Elicit A Prescribed Response

Here are a few pillars of this new scale. First, there are no degrees of dislike. There is no fun in finding if you hate something as opposed to if you abhor it. Just dislike it and move on. Second, there is nothing wrong with stopping at one level and not proceeding to the other, and trying to change someone else's rating is counterproductive to this experiment. If Betty tells Jeff that she only likes Band XYZ, Jeff should applaud the Betty's ability to understand her own taste and not berate her for failing to fully embrace the majesty of Band XYZ. This leads us to the last rule.

Lastly, and perhaps most importantly, people are allowed to change their opinions over time. Let us use out previous example. Betty, since she last saw Jeff, has spent some more time listening to the Band XYZ canon and has grown to truly appreciate the subtle nuance of the guitar playing. She has upgraded to loving the ban. But Jeff becomes frustrated. he wonders why this sudden change has happened in Betty. Why couldn't she see the awesomeness before? Is she trying to appear as if she is a fan in order to look cool to strangers? Jeff shuns Betty and tells her that she will never be a "real fan". Betty kills Jeff with a flamethrower.

You're Too Stupid To Have A Good Time

Now both characters overreacted to the situation. There was no need for Betty to kill Jeff. While he was being a total dick about things, he didn't deserve to die. Similarly Jeff was way out of line with Betty. Does it really matter that Betty changed her mind about a band? Who really cares? Shouldn't Jeff have been happy that there was someone he could share his interests with? I think so. But instead he ended up dead. So sad.

When finding one's self in a discussion about culture, be sure to check your reactions. Be wary of overstating an allegiance to a particular film or book. Is it really that good? Is it really that bad? In essence, the goal is to eliminate exaggeration when possible. It helps everyone.

On with the new scale!

I'd Thought You'd Be Bigger

-1 : Hate/Dislike/Abhor

Save for things that are worthy of scorn. Is the work offensive? If not, think about upgrading to "OK".

Examples: The Pest, Cool As Ice, Creed, Nickelback, Godfather Part III

0 : OK

For works that are neutral. In all honesty, does the work create a feeling of ambivalence? Use when having a hard time remembering details of the work.

Examples: Most things that people think they hate/like, Step by Step, M. Night Shyamalan, Christina Aguilera

1 : Like

The overall feeling the work gives is positive. Do qualifiers appear when discussing the work (examples: PRETTY good, KINDA liked it, FAIRLY descent)? If so something may be preventing a leap into fully accepting the work.

Examples: Jerry Bruckheimer movies, Huey Lewis and the News, R.E.M, The Addams Family

2: Love

The positive feeling of the work creates a desire to convince others of the works worthiness. Do quotes from the work pepper conversation? Something deeper than like would drive a person to visit Wikipedia, IMDB, or the official website for more information.

Examples: The Andy Griffith Show, The Beatles, The Godfather, The Wizard of Oz, Seinfeld, Weezer's Blue Album

3 : Ardor/Devotion/Passion

The positive feeling may cause a desire to protect the work rather than proselytize. Was the work first discovered during the ages of 12-17? Is there a suspicion that others can never enjoy the work to it's fullest? Save for when the work is precious, deeply sentimental, formative, and or is perceived to describe a personal quality of the fan.

Examples (of what devoted fans look like): Star Trek, KISS, Rocky Horror Picture Show, Harry Potter, Star Wars

I Got Married, To An Ugly Woman. Don't Ever Do That. It Just Takes The Energy Right Out Of You.

So I say all of this to say, you probably don't hate Road House. You are actually ambivalent toward it and may even like it. So stop groaning in conversations when I say that i love this movie. Search your honest feelings before speaking. You may find that you don't have any.

And I won't have to spend an afternoon writing about it.

Until Next I Blog,

James