Week 7: Donnie Darko

Dear Avid Reader,

Can a movie be awesome even though you hate it? I say yes. This is because I've seen Donnie Darko.

Go Home And Tell Your Parents Everything's Gonna Be O.K.

Donnie Darko is a terrible movie. Now I wonder if I hate this movie because it is truly awful, or because it was made for teenagers after I was no longer a teenager. Did I simply become a fuddy-duddy at 22? Maybe teenagers of this generation just like awful movies. That sounds like something a fuddy-dudy would say. These dumb teenagers and their dumb awful movies made me sound like a fuddy-duddy.

I'm going to stop typing fuddy-duddy right now.

Every Living Creature On Earth Dies Alone

Here's why I don't like the film. Everyone in the film is some form of unlikeable a-hole. The End.

Let's use Donnie as an example. Donnie is a troubled misanthrope that can't decide if he has a heart of gold or is full of rage at an unsatisfying world. He defends Cherita at the bus stop, but is a total, unjustifiable brat to his mom. He is kind to Gretchen but he is vicious to his sisters. He bullies the teachers at his school but is in turn bullied by fellow students. Donnie has it both ways. Now some might say that the character has complexity, but I disagree. He's just an unlikeable a-hole.

See, the duality isn't given nuance. Rather it relies on tropes that are all smashed together. Here are some more of the movie's smashed up tropes:

- Predominately white suburban neighborhood appears to be happy and wealthy but underneath is spiritually unfulfilling.
- Intellectual family at center of movie feels under attack from stupid and politically conservative members of community.
- Psychiatrist that pushes for more medication.
- Lone teacher who "gets" art is embattled with conservative school administration.
- Spiritual leader that is big on traditional values but has secret, deviant, sexual proclivities.
- Pop culture conversation that inserts a depth to a TV show/movie/song that reframes the work in a funny/interesting light.

Wait, I do that last one all the time. I'm doing it right now. Ignore the last line.

Why Do You Wear That Stupid Bunny Suit?

The problem isn't that the tropes are used, it's the feeling I get from them. The movie's seams are jagged and crooked. I feel like I've seen this movie before only better. There are attempts at originality, like with the time travel thing (TTT).

Now, I like the TTT, but if you start reading blog posts about it, hardcore fans seem to think that it is some huge, really deep aspect of the film. Like there is something more to it that what is offered. But there isn't, it's real simple. I'll explain. Donnie can see the immediate future through the cool, chest special effect. Frank helps Donnie understand that what he is experiencing from the plane crash on is life if he decides to live as opposed to die in the crash. He is given a the choice to sacrifice himself or Gretchen. He chooses himself. See, simple stuff. I mean this is all covered in It's A Wonderful Life. And George Bailey did act like a douche to everyone.

Time's Up Frank Said

And the TTT leads to the dumbest conversation in the movie. The one between Dr. Monnitoff and Donnie later in the movie, the second one they have. The one where we start to get into how the TTT works that ends when Monnitoff says that continuing it will cause him to get fired. Fired. For talking theoretical science. Seriously? Talking about time travel? That doesn't make any sense. Even the most backwards administration wouldn't fire the guy for talking about what is basically science fiction.

Or maybe the worst conversation is between Pomeroy and the principal when she gets fired. You know, the one where she gives her impassioned plea for the welfare of the students, minus the passion. The one where no clear reason for the firing is offered not because it's been a long time coming from constant fighting with the school leaders, but because the writer is lazy. The one where it looks like Drew is reading her lines out of a script in her lap. I hate this movie.

Sometimes I Doubt Your Commitment To Sparkle Motion

What really bugs me about the flick is that it feeds into the belief that negative people are smarter or better than people that are positive. Mrs. Pomeroy and Donnie spend the entire flick hatin', and they are the heroes of the movie. This just infuriates me. Why are the most condescending characters getting top billing? It's because it's such an easy tactic: being critical means you are more authentic, more honest.

And no one exemplifies this more than Donnie. He acts as the untouchable judge, the administrator of justice against hypocrisy, throughout the flick. But he isn't perfect. He isn't above everyone. He's just a kid with an attitude and psychological problems that has a penchant for needling community leaders publicly. Try getting elected judge with that wacky resume.

But here's the thing, the opposite is also true. It's just as honest to look for the cool things about something as it is for the lame things. It's just as authentic to say something is good as it is to say it's bad. It's also more fun to be raving about stuff. And I realize the irony of bashing a movie for an essay and then saying that it's wrong to bash things. Or is it not irony but hypocrisy? Idiocy? I hate this movie.

What's Cellar Door?

But I love this movie for one thing. At the talent show Cherie does the angel dance and all of the characters clap loudly for her. Now while some jerks scream jeers, the others just clap louder. That's what I'm talking about. We need more of that. Maybe I like this movie. I'm conflicted. Are there other cool parts? Now that I think about, there are. The school montage set to Tears for Fears early in the movie is the greatest sequence ever. It rules! It's better than the actual video for "Head Over Heels". ALL the music in the flick is great. Yeah. I'm starting to feel good about Donnie Darko.

Nah, I really hate this movie. It's an awesome movie that I hate. I'm not going to explain how that is possible. You're just going to have to go with it.

Until Next I Blog,

James

P.S. I ask "Is that Seth Rogen?" everytime he comes on-screen too.